Love isn’t in the falling, it’s in the staying there.

When H1 arrived, I was overwhelmed as a new mummy. Everything and anything was about her. I thought Mr K would be feeling blessed that I am such a committed mummy to his precious one and that he would be happy to take care of me while I take care of the little one. Yes to both actually, however, something is wrong with this equation. WHO would take care of him? I had neglected him and we were getting distant. We got to a point where I think we kinda stop caring for each other. We had less conversations, and more arguments. The big ‘D’ was brought up before (there… I told you, I’m crazy at times).

I do not quite remember when or exactly how things got better. I recalled that we had heated arguments, crying sessions, many many heartaches…. I think it is when we realised how much pain we are inflicting onto each other that made us change our attitudes. We didn’t change overnight. It took time. We put in efforts on how we communicated, we believed there are good intentions to each other’s actions and words (we clarified calmly if we are unsure), we opened up more and shared our thoughts. We pieced back love and trust bit by bit. Eventually, our lives are back together as one again. Hooray!

Recently, I sent Mr K a proposed plan/ schedule for a happy marriage as part of our efforts to maintain and improve our marriage. Listed are part of the proposed plan (well, i omitted some as they are for our eyes only).

• Kiss each other first thing in the morning. (Hazel is actually doing that with us now.)
• Kiss each other whenever we meet and part.
• Goes to bed together and kiss before sleeping.
• Hold hands or hug around the waist when we walk whenever we can.
• Weekly couple time (Mr K is rather into gaming and this does get on my nerves. I proposed for tech free tuesday and thursday. No phone, no tv, etc. We have yet to do it, but I believe we will.)
• Weekly me time
• Exercise together (part of our couple time and exercise produces endorphins which makes us happy!)
• Share on household chores (Note: be specific on what you would want your other half to help with).

Remember, Love isn’t in the falling, it’s in the staying there.

To Mr K – Thank you for staying by my side even though I tried to push you away.